Thursday August 20th -Guest Speaking at a Fundraising Event for Sunnybrrok Hospital

I was asked to speak at a golf tournament that was to help raise money for the Women and Babies program at Sunnybrook Hospital (aka Women's College). When I was asked I did not hesitate to accept the invitation (as much as I hate to public speak) as I am so passionate about the hospital and staff that saved Sebastians life. The golf tournament was held at a beautiful golf course in Toronto called Eagles Nest.


When I arrived with Sebastian (to pull at the heartstrings of the golfers) and Steinar (as support and because he would never say no to anything to do with golf), I was amazed at how beautiful the club house was and the quality of people in attendance.

The public relations people were very appreciative of our family being in attendance. The event was done up to the nines and it was the annual Sofina Golf Classic. The owners of the company the Latifi family were amazing and hold this foundation very close to their hearts. They have committed to help fund the High Risk Operating Suite within the new Sunnybrook Health Science Centre's new Women and Babies Program. This means a 1.5 million dollar commitment.

The people attending this event were kind and welcoming. They showed parts of my video from the fund raising effort we had done months ago for one night live. I was asked to speak after the video. When I watched the video it made me cry to see how far we have come and the road we had travelled. So by the time I got on stage to speak I was a bit chocked up to say the least and hence the introduction began. My speech writer (grandma) did a spectacular job and I was able to present with strength and conviction a supportive and glowing review of the hospital and their staff. With Steinar by my side holding Sebastian the 150 people in attendance gave us a roaring standing ovation and not a dry eye was in the room. I am pleased to say that 240 thousand dollars was presented to the Women and Babies Program and I am sure some of that my have to do with Sebastian being in attendance.

To let you know the kind of event this was one of the live auction items was a Presidential lecture with Bush and Clinton followed by photo's and an intimate dinner President Clinton. The other items were awesome and Steinar made sure I did not raise my hands to top the 28 thousand dollar bid for a Oceanfront Villa in the Turks and Caicos (I was tempted).

The picture of Steinar outside is when the auction was loud daddy stepped out to quiet it down for Sebastian. The sky was amazing and the weather had been incredible with a tornado touching down just west of us during the fundraiser.

What a night. I think we are going to be the new spokes people for the Women and Babies Program.

A happy day for daddy as we vist the Norwegian Consulate to get Sebastian citizen ship and a Norwegian Passport

On Wednesday we went to the Norwegian Consulate to get Sebastian registered as a Norwegian Citizen and get him his second passport. I think it was one of Steinar's most proud moments. Sebastian will carry two citizenships until the age of 21 when he will have to make a decission if he is Norwegian or Canadian. I am hoping by that time he will not have to make the choice and Norway will allow him both citizenships.
I am sure grandma Britta will be pleased with the days events.

Loving visits

It is so nice having mom and dad so close as they are able to drop by on a regular basis. Mom seems to have more time with Sebastian and is always cuddling him. Dad not so much as both of them are very hot blooded and overheat on contact. So we now put a pillow on grandpa's lap and they can look at each other without getting too hot and bothered.

The sweater and the teddy bear

You may be wondering why I posted this. Since this is eventually going to be a log/diary for our son I want to make sure the important things are added. My Aunt Theresa was kind enough to make this sweater and mail it to Sebastian all the way from England. By the time we received it the Sebastian had grown to the point where the sweater did not fit. My Aunt kindly told me to give it to someone who could use it. I loved it and could not pass it on as it had been made lovingly for my son and I wanted to use it in some way.
It now sits on a very old teddy bear that (and she may not know this) my grandpa (her and my fathers father) gave to me when I was two years old. That was 40 years ago. wow. So I found it very fitting to display two very important items from two very important people in my life. I think it is a perfect fit.
Aunt Theresa you can make this sweater for me and I could eventually pass it down to Sebastian. :) It is lovely. Thanks!

Going out for the day -Keoni gets baptised

It was really nice to get out of the house for the afternoon to celebrate my friend Meredith's sons baptism. It was a great event and while at the service we were thrilled to meet up with Pressie who was one of the fantastic nurses who worked at both hospitals that Sebastian was staying in (sounds like he was in a hotel). She immediately took Sebastian and took care of his feeds and looking after him with lots of cuddles so I was able to enjoy the day. Now I guess we have to think about Sebastian's baptism.

Update

Quick update. Sebastian is well. I actually heard him cry for the first time this week when he was given his immunization shots. It was not for long but it was a baby crying. He is currently 8 pounds 10.5 ounces or Aunt T he is 3.91 kg. He is getting bigger. Sebastian is currently going through a growth spurt so his eating and sleeping times are currently all over the place.
We had a follow up eye exam and he got a clean bill of health. Thank God as prems are prone to having eye issues. Our next appointment for his eye check up is in six months when he will be checked for having lazy eye or to see if he is in need of glasses.
These pictures were taken today.

Steph and family thank you so much for the beautiful outfit sent from Portugal and Aunt Theresa the sweater you knitted was awesome but a bit small. I am thinking of framing it with your card as I can't think of giving it away as it is so pretty.

Thank you all.

Thanks Amanda for sending this to me.

"How Preemie Moms Are Chosen"
--by Erma Bombeck

Did you ever wonder how the mothers of premature babies are chosen?

Somehow, I visualize God hovering Earth, selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to take notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."

Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles. "Give her a preemie."

The angel is curious. "Why this one God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," smiles God. "Could I give a premature baby a mother who knows no laughter? That would be cruel."

"But does she have the patience?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she'll drown in a sea of self-pity and despair.
Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle it.

I watched her today. She has that sense of self and independence so rare and so necessary in a mother.
You see, the child I am going to give her has a world of it's own. She has to make it live in her world, and that's not going to be easy."

God smiles. "This one is perfect. She has just the right amount of selfishness. "
The angel gasps, "Selfishness! Is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn't know it yet, but she is to be envied.

She will never take for granted a spoken word. She will never consider a step ordinary. When her child says "momma" for the first time, she will be witness to a miracle and know it.

I will permit her to see clear the things that I see - ignorance, cruelty, prejudice - and allow her to rise above them.

She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."

"But what about her Patron Saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in the air. God smiles.
"A mirror will suffice."

Shout out of thanks to Wendy Moulsdale RN, MN IBCLC (not sure what the letters mean but I have alot of respect for her)

A big thank you to a lovely woman from Womens College Hospital. Wendy is a nurse (not just a nurse but a nurse with special skills). Not only did she give alot of love and care to Sebastian when he was at Womens but she made a point of knowing what made him tick.

We went through some interesting times when everyone was trying to figure out what was up with Sebastian and she came to the conclusion after going back daily (and that's alot of information to absorb) what exactly was wrong or not wrong with our little boy and made sure he was not treated for something he did not have. Wendy or should I say Auntie Wendy gave Sebastian a wonderful book prior to us moving hospitals and made me feel really special. Three days ago I had some medical questions (turned out to be about half an hour of medical questions) and although I know it was a very buys time for her she did not rush me and took the time to give me answers to my many questions. Those she did not know the answers to she consulted with people who knew and e-mailed me the information. I know she keeps up with the blog (was surprised when she told me) and I wanted to give her a special thank you for all her dedication, love and care of us both. You are a special lady Nurse Wendy and I am grateful for your time and help.

Steinar and Sebastian share quality time

So I was doing what new moms do (laundry, trying to clean, etc, etc....... as Steinar was on baby watch.

I come back and notice that they have huge similarities. You may not notice from the picture but they were both fast asleep, slightly facing each other and very relaxed. It is so nice to see them sharing quality time. lol

Grandma and Grandpa give lots of love

It is so important to me that my mom and dad are a huge part of Sebastian's life. They are the most loving, kind and supportive parents one can ask for. The daily visits have been awesome and I love seeing how comfortable Sebastian is with them. I know he is in good hands so I am able to run errands, sleep (between doctors appointments) and just relax when he is in their care. I have a new found respect for all women (particularly mothers) as I think it is the hardest yet most rewarding job in the world.

Thanks in particular to my mom who I could not love more especially the last few weeks. She is my rock.

Today (Sunday August 2nd)

Today is the second last day before Steinar goes back to work. I am taking the time when I can to update the blog and keep everyone in the loop. Things are getting a bit easier as the days go on although they all seem to blend one day into the next. Sebastian has been home 11 days already and I still can't believe I don't have to go to the hospital daily. Life is very surreal. I have not had a watch on my arm since I was admitted into the hospital on March 24th. It is so strange that my son will be four months old on August 10th (although we will also have to go by his corrected age of 16 days). I hope to find the balance soon to be able to blog more often or at least weekly.

Thanks everyone for thinking of us and keeping up to date.

Aunt Tiny and Andrea thanks for calling from Jamaica.

Nancy B -congratulations on your pregnancy. I know you are reading this blog and I want you to know I am thrilled for you and your DH. it is about time. :)

Friday July 31st - Passport photo day

Today we decided to get Sebastian his Canadian Passport so that we can get his Norwegian Passport and Citizenship next month. We were told to dress him in dark clothing as they have to lay him on a white board on the floor in order to get his shot. I was told that the Passport authorities are very picky about infants photos so Blacks told us if we were turned away they would do it again at no charge until they got it right.

Needless to say we tripped off to the mall on our first outing (other the his first doctors appointment) and we got his passport photos taken. After 349 shots were taken they managed to get one with his eyes open, looking straight ahead without our hands in the photo (from holding him straight). I was determined to get his passport done that day. So after filling out the application and dropping of "the boys" at home, I started the 20 minute journey to Whitby (a nearby town with a passport office). What I should have realized was that traveling away from Toronto (east) on a Friday of a long weekend was insane. Needless to say I made it to the office in about an hour and a half and had his passport application submitted within 15 minutes. Why so quick you ask? Nobody wants to be sitting in the passport office on a Friday of a long weekend. All in all it did not work out too badly and we should have our treasured documents in our hot little hands within two weeks. Yeah!
We are looking at traveling to Norway for Christmas so he can meet his Norwegian family.

Sebastian chills with Steinar at home

This is the day after we got home. It was one of the most tiring nights of my life. Sebastian is a sweet child and does not complain much. He does not cry but grunts alot which (from what I have been told) is not unusual for the prems to do. Although everyone from my mom to my Aunt Tiny and Steinar's mom would like to have the baby howling for better lung development. I understand that but at the moment I don't mind as much quiet as I can get.
Steinar has been a superstar in caring for his son and after I do the night feeds he is up in the morning so I can get a bit more sleep. They then have a bit of tummy time and quiet time together. For the most part Steinar sleeps through the night while I do not. I have Steinar on one side of me making sleeping noises and Sebastian on the other side of me and I am straining to hear his sleeping sounds. It makes for a very long loud and stressful night. I guess I have to get used to the noises and learn to sleep when he does. Easier said then done.

Sebastians last bath at the hospital (Daddy Time)

This was Sebastian's last bath at the hospital. Daddy gets to do all the bathing of Sebastian as it creates some male bonding time. Plus it gives mommy a break. It is also the time when VJ and Keoni (our friends and hospital mates) can hang out with the boys.

Car seat testing

Prior to Sebastian's being able to go home he has to be put in a car seat for an hour and a half to make sure he is able to make the trip. Monitors are put on him to check his breathing and stats. Sebastian was ok for the first hour and then was a bit ticked off at sitting and staring at the same thing for another half an hour. Needless to say we passed the test or we would not have made it out the door of the hospital.

Care by parent also to be known as night of no rest

This is from about two weeks ago. Prior to leaving the hospital you (the parent) is encouraged to stay the night in a "care by parent room". This means staying the night giving the full care to your child so that it mimics the "home environment". I was going to stay two nights but that changed rather quickly. I arrived at the hospital prior to 8pm and was ready to take on the job of caring for my child. We were checked in (given the key) and after pulling out the single chair into a bed and trying to get settled we were doing it alone for the night.
It was a nice evening and I was super positive. By the time I got Sebastian settled from his 9pm feed it was already 11 pm. So I closed my eyes for about 20 minutes (lights fully on of course) and settled in to listen to my sons breathing. Before too long the nurse was at the door saying "room service" as she handed me my bottle of milk for the midnight feed.

By the time that was done and I had put Sebastian down I was ready for my hour and a half of sleep when the sound of a baby crying was loud in my room. Even louder were the two parents trying to quiet their crying child in the care by parent room next door. It turned out that the child next door was on the opposite schedule then Sebastian so that night was no sleep. I got through the 3am feed and by the time "room service" came with 6am feed I was ready to check out of the "care by parent room" which in no way resembled our home as we don't have to deal with another crying baby on a different schedule then our son.
So that was my only night of stay at the hospital as I needed sleep and I was trying to figure out why the care by parent room had only a single bed. I thought parenting was a joint venture.